Best Man

In other unrelated wedding news, my high school bestie is getting married! He and his fiancée got engaged a few months ago. His fiancée is furiously planning the wedding, even though the tentative wedding date is about a year and a half away.

I was hanging out with my high school bestie and his fiancée a couple days ago, and they informed me that I’m going to be the best man! They chose me a long time ago, but they neglected/forgot to tell me until now. My high school bestie also hasn’t told the other groomsmen that they’re groomsmen!

I’m honored and flattered that my high school bestie chose me to be the best man, but I’m already nervous about giving a speech at the wedding a year and a half from now. I hate public speaking!

Also, isn’t the best man supposed to plan certain things for the wedding, like the bachelor party? I’m going to be away at graduate school for the next couple years, so I wonder how involved I can be in planning anything. I hope I can just delegate the responsibilities to someone who will be around to help.


3 Responses to “Best Man”

  1. Lisa Says:

    I have helped my husband and a couple other men write very, very successful best man speeches. Some have been long, and some have been short, but they all share a common formula.

    1) Compliment the bride. She looks beautiful, she’s a wonderful person, the groom is lucky to have landed her.

    2) Tease the groom. Never ever ever say anything racy or overly embarrassing, never say anything about past girlfriends or dalliances or anything like that. But silly inside things, like how you can always beat him at Scrabble.

    3) Get sappy. This part nearly always starts, “But seriously…” and it’s where you talk about what a great friend the groom is, how he’s like a brother, stuff like that. How you know they are going to have a long and happy marriage, how they obviously are so in love, and how much you love them both.

    Then the final, raise your glass with me for the bride and groom.

    BONUS: If one or both of them are of a strong ethnic background, learn how to say Cheers in that language. EG., my husband’s whole family is Czech, so our best man said “Cheers” in Czech and everyone in the room thought it was the coolest thing ever.

    And it is acceptable, and even preferred for you to have a written script! Write it ahead of time, practice it a lot. Best man speeches can be really beige and forgettable, or (horror among horrors) awkward and embarrassing, or charming and sincere and a highlight of the evening. It’s all in the preparation.

    Last bit of advice: no drinking until AFTER the speech! Maybe just one about 20 minutes before to relax you a bit, but that is IT!!! Afterwards…. go wild. 🙂

    • normalboy Says:

      Thanks for the advice, Lisa! You’re always full of insight. 🙂

      An update: My high school bestie is moving his wedding up a whole year to five months from now! I’m going to be using your advice a lot sooner than I was expecting!

  2. Fulfilling The Best Man Duties « Normal Boy Says:

    […] ideas the night before, but the evening was over before I could churn out even a first draft. With Lisa’s advice from months ago open in my browser, I spent many hours trying to come up with an overarching theme […]

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