Self-Conscious

I made a few more mistakes today. I’m not confident in my abilities, so I ask my friend/boss for everything, but he doesn’t want me to ask him for everything anymore. He wants me to make my own mistakes and learn from them. I am learning, but I hate that I have to make mistakes to learn. I hate looking like a novice.

I really am too self-conscious for the business world. I’ve been a very self-conscious person all my life. I’ve always been afraid that people will judge me and either think I’m stupid or just generally look down on me.

I don’t know why what other people think is so important, but it is. Hopefully I can get over it soon and move forward. No one succeeds in business if they dwell on their mistakes and embarrassments forever.

In other news, my friend/boss and his boyfriend are going to LA Pride (commonly known as just “Pride”) tomorrow. They invited me to go with them, but I’m supposed to go to my cousin’s master’s graduation. Unfortunately, family obligations come before big gay celebrations. Oh well, maybe next year.

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