I’m so fickle. When I first started studying for the first actuarial exam, I got really interested in the actuary field. I studied really hard for a while, but after a few months, I started having my doubts. I questioned whether the actuary path was really what I wanted. I lost momentum when it came time to study for the second exam.

The same thing is happening again. Working at Target was so different from anything I had ever done before. It was refreshing. I jumped in and loved the whole experience. I saw the management path open up, and I convinced myself that I could be really good at it. Now, after a few months, the interest is starting to wane.

My store team leader (STL) told me today that he (finally) sent off my resume to the other STL. I’m supposed to expect a call either this week or next. But after waiting for so many weeks for something to happen, I’m not even sure if I want the position anymore. Don’t get me wrong; I still love my job. I just don’t know if I will love it if I stay a long time.

I really have to think long and hard about what I really want in life. I have to start applying for other jobs and stop waiting on a job that may not even be right for me.


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