Sin Without Action

I hung out with a friend from college today. We went shopping for video games, played multiplayer games wirelessly on Nintendo DS, and went out to dinner. It was really relaxed, light, and fun. Good times.

This friend of mine is a Christian, very firm in his beliefs. I was a Christian when I met him, and we became good friends through religion and video games. It hit him hard when I came out to him. He still believes that homosexuality is a sin, but he didn’t want to lose our friendship over it.

I didn’t want to lose his friendship either. So even though he knows I’m gay, I don’t talk about boys or dating with him very much (usually only vaguely and briefly). We’re still close in other ways.

All these thoughts about religion and homosexuality got me thinking. I don’t have much experience with dating and relationships, and I’ve basically lost all hope that I ever will find a boy who will love me. I’m starting to be okay with that. So here’s my question. If I never actually find someone to love and “be gay with,” then how different am I from a straight guy who never finds love? In particular, does the church frown upon a celibate (not by choice) gay boy?

I know some Christians denounce impure thoughts as sin too. But honestly, I don’t have that many of those. My fantasies are about holding hands and hugging (usually with clothes on). Is that still a sin? Is just being gay enough to send me to hell?

When I was a Christian, I felt really guilty all the time. When I was alone, I used to cry because I was gay. I prayed that I would be normal. I thought about hell and homosexuality pretty often. But now, this whole discussion doesn’t really bother me anymore. I’m just curious.

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One Response to “Sin Without Action”

  1. anothernormalboy Says:

    If you still read this, please make up your own mind as what is a sin or not. Remember Jesus was friends with those that were *considered* at that time. I really think you should be comfortable with your religion. I am christian and used to think gay was wrong, but as one grows older you find that real sin is lack of love, towards others, and not leastly towards yourself.
    As for finding love start with giving yourself the right to be loved. Then take small steps towards finding love. I say small since any change will take some time with no fast results – so begin today!
    your brother in Christ


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