Guilty Indulgence

I went out to dinner with some high school friends tonight. We ate at Olive Garden, my favorite Italian chain restaurant. I got my favorite dish, the “Tour of Italy,” which is a sampler platter of chicken parmigiana, lasagna, and fetticune alfredo. Why choose what you want to eat if you can have it all?

It’s been a long time since I’ve had such a large quantity of food. I’ve been trying to lose weight and keep it off, so I haven’t been indulging myself too much. As a result, a meal that was once easy to polish off became pretty intimidating. While I did finish the Tour of Italy, I felt like I shouldn’t have. All the effort I put going to the gym four times a week feels like it’s gone down the drain.

After dinner, we ended up going to Pinkberry, a trendy frozen “yogurt” place that started in LA. It’s technically not yogurt, but it’s still almost healthy, relative to all the other desserts out there. You can get an assortment of toppings on the frozen “yogurt,” including freshly cut fruit (with no added syrups), cereal (like Cap’n Crunch and Cocoa Pebbles), chocolate chips, almonds, and Oreo bits. Trying to stay healthy, I got mango, strawberries, and blueberries on my medium sized frozen “yogurt.” Even still, I felt like I was spoiling myself too much, especially since I had just had a whole Tour of Italy.

At first, I felt guilty for indulging myself so much tonight. But thinking about it, I feel a little strange that I felt guilty. Am I so obsessed with my weight and body image that I can’t enjoy an evening with my friends and eat some of my favorite foods? It’s been months since I’ve had such a calorie-rich evening, and I’m sure there won’t be another one for a while. One night isn’t going to cause irreparable damage to my health, so why am I so worried? I don’t even have scheduled cheat days on my diet like some people (I have a friend who has those every Friday).

No matter what, I already ate all that food. I’m just going to go back to my normal diet and exercise plan. I’m sure I’ll be fine. It’s so rare for me to hang out with my friends these days. If the cost of hanging out with them is a few hundred extra calories, then it’s worth the sacrifice.


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