Low AR

This has been an amazing week at work. Due in large part to my collecting efforts, my company’s AR (accounts receivable, i.e., the amount of money people owe us) is currently low, which is good (lower AR means lower risk). I finally feel competent at managing our AR.

Not only have our customers been cooperative in paying (mostly) on time, but also my boss has had almost zero contact with me all week. No interrogating questions, no harsh instant messages, no nothing. She’s been out of town the last three weeks, but this is the only week that she loosened her grip over me. She comes back into the office this afternoon, though, so hopefully she won’t ruin my great week.

The icing on the cake was a couple days ago when my big boss told me that our AR was pretty good and actually thanked me! He had never thanked me before, so that was a big a moment.

As much as I don’t want to stay at this company and despite my best efforts not to, I still care about my job. It’s great to be recognized for my work and not be questioned constantly when I clearly know what I’m doing. That’s all I want.

Besides a raise, of course.

My Two Sisters

I spent the weekend with my sister in Irvine. We haven’t spent much time together since I came out to her, which is why I made it a point to go visit her by myself. As expected, my sister treated me no differently than she always has (which is good). Occasionally over the weekend, my sexuality was brought up, but it was never uncomfortable. She asked me about my recent dates and whether I’ve had my first kiss yet (a valid question, since I’ve never had a boyfriend), and we talked about how much we both like Paul Rudd and Bradley Cooper (and other cute/hot actors)! The weekend was great!

On a separate topic, my sister mentioned that she’s considering going to nursing school. She is currently in sales and hates her job, even more than I hate mine (from what I’ve heard, her boss is worse). She wants to go back to school because she wants a “career,” not just a “job.” My sister has her condo’s mortgage to pay, so quitting her job and going back to school full time (even for a few months) would definitely be a challenge, especially since she’s planning on either being a mom or mom-to-be in a year from now (she’s getting married in three months). Still, if nursing is the career she wants to pursue, I think she should go for it. It’s never too late.

Interestingly, my big sister from work had a similar conversation with me last week. She has decided to go to culinary school starting next month! She wanted to go ten years ago, but she took the safe route of holding onto a secure job with our company instead (which is what her mom wanted). Now that she doesn’t work for us (besides these three weeks she’s been back) and she doesn’t have the financial burdens from when she was younger (she lives with her lawyer boyfriend and has no kids), there’s no reason for her not to pursue her dream career.

Even though their situations are different, my two sisters (my real sister and my big sister from work) both hate their jobs and want to make bold changes in their careers. I’m about ten years younger than both of them (they are one year apart from each other), but I’m at a somewhat parallel stage in my life. I don’t want to work for ten years at a job I hate before ultimately deciding to make a change and do something that I should have done now. The time for change is coming.

Disneyland Wednesday

I love Disneyland. I used to go every summer throughout most of college and graduate school with one of my best friends. We used to plan out our day so well that we could go on every single ride in the park. So, even though it had been three years since my last visit, I didn’t feel the need to do that this time.

My parents and I went on our favorite rides (like It’s A Small World, Pirates of the Carribean, and the Haunted Mansion) but didn’t worry about missing out on the rides with ridiculous two-hour long lines (like Space Mountain and Splash Mountain). A hectic run around Disneyland is fun, but the leisurely pace we had this time was great too. I did make sure to catch any new rides that came out since my last visit, though, like the Finding Nemo submarine ride (I still remember the original one that had nothing to do with Disney).

Disneyland was more crowded than I thought it would be on a Wednesday, but the weather was great. I was hesitant to take off work at first, but having a break in the middle of the week is fantastic! It makes the week seem so much shorter.

We got home around 1:30am, and I didn’t sleep until after 2am, but I was surprisingly awake at work the next day (yesterday). I was pretty busy, so I didn’t have time to be tired.

As for this weekend, I will be driving down to Irvine today after work to visit my sister! I’ve never driven down to Irvine before (I’ve been there, but I never drove), but after driving to Big Bear Lake last month, it should be a breeze. My sister and I don’t have much planned (besides cake tasting for her wedding!), but I’m sure it’s going to be a fun weekend!

District 9 Date

The online guy and I scheduled to meet in front of the movie theatre about 45 minutes before our planned movie time so that we could eat first. I arrived first. When the online guy arrived, he said he had had a big lunch and wasn’t really hungry. Even though I had had only a light lunch of frozen yogurt with my big sister from work, I didn’t want to force him to eat or watch me eat (I like being accommodating). We instead caught an earlier showing of District 9 and completely skipped having dinner together. We bought our own tickets (but I later thought to myself that I should have bought his ticket because he bought me dinner last time).

I had mentioned to the online guy that I don’t really watch scary movies, so he kept apologizing when every trailer we saw before the movie started was for a scary movie. It was cute. District 9 is definitely not my usual kind of movie (he knew that too), but I liked it! The story was really interesting and well told.

The online guy and I didn’t talk much during the movie, but we talked for a bit in the parking lot afterwards. We hugged at the end of the night, and he said I could pick the movie next time, but I don’t really think our movie night counted as a date. We seem to be more like two friends hanging out, which is okay with me. I still had a pretty good night!

Dinner And A Movie

My movie date with the online guy has been rescheduled to tonight! Last time, I asked him (via text message) if he wanted to see a movie. This time, he said he was getting out of work earlier today (we actually had this text conversation yesterday), so we made plans for tonight. Once we decided on the movie (he suggested District 9) and the theatre, I asked if he wanted to get dinner too. We’re going to meet up a little before the movie starts so we can grab a bite to eat. Dinner and a movie!

Meanwhile, my mom’s friend’s wife works at Disneyland, so we’re able to get free tickets on non-blackout days. Even though I would rather go on a weekend so as to not miss work (I really care way too much about my thankless job), my parents convinced/pressured/guilted me (the way parents do) into taking tomorrow off so we can go on a less crowded weekday.

I think my parents are more excited about going to Disneyland than I am. Usually I’m the one who’s pushing everyone else to go, but this time, I’m just thinking about how tiring it is to go in the middle of the week. I will be less than functional at work on Thursday, I’m sure. But I already asked for the day off, so there’s no going back now; I’d be crazy not to go.

Side note: Yes, I’m going to Disneyland with my parents. It’s not as much of a drag as it sounds. I actually like spending time with my parents (except in the mornings – I’m definitely not a morning person).

Enlightening Lunches

I’ve had a good week. My boss is out of town for a couple weeks on business, so work is a lot less stressful right now (not enough to slack off, unfortunately). Not only that, but my big sister from work (who left the company at the end of February) came back to help while my boss is away! Her presence alone makes the workday much more enjoyable, and I’ve been having lunch with her almost every day this week!

My lunches with my big sister from work are always enlightening (and, as a side note, often involve frozen yogurt). She was with our company for ten years, so she has a lot of stories and wisdom to impart. She explained how a lot of the dysfunction within our company stems from the way my boss and my big boss work and interact with each other. I knew this to an extent, but I now understand more as to why my boss acts the way she does (not just to me). I won’t go into detail for security/anonymity reasons, but I feel sorry for my boss.

In other news, my movie date with the online guy didn’t happen. Yet. He text messaged me Thursday morning to say that he had to work late so we would have to reschedule. Working late is a common excuse, but I trust him; from what I’ve learned about him so far, he seems like a very nice guy (much nicer than me). We haven’t set a new date yet, but I definitely plan on following through with seeing him again. Stay tuned!

Text Dating

Last week, only an hour before my date with the second online guy, the first online guy text messaged me. It was Wednesday, and not a single day had gone by since the previous Friday without either a phone call or text message from him. I was starting to get annoyed. At first he asked how I was doing, but then he asked what I was doing for the evening, which I felt was getting creepy. Does he need to know what I’m doing all the time?

I politely responded to his messages. I was generally curt and didn’t really ask him questions, but he kept text messaging back. Eventually, he asked if we could “talk for a bit.” I thought that maybe he sensed my apathy and wanted to see what I was feeling, so I called him. No, I was wrong. He really just wanted to talk. About nothing. For forty minutes. I really didn’t care what he had for dinner, and I found it a little creepy that he asked what I had. He was asking almost as if we were officially dating (going steady). I don’t even talk to my best friends every day!

About 15-20 minutes before my date with the second online guy, I abruptly cut off my phone call (if I hadn’t, I’m sure he would have rambled on for hours). I must have been too nice to let him continue to talk to me for so long, because I was really not in the mood to talk to him. I guess I’m just not good at telling him what I really think.

The next day (Thursday), he text messaged me again, this time during lunch. He said he was at Third Street (Promenade) eating lunch. He asked how I was doing and hoped that I was having a good day. By this point, I decided I definitely did not want to get to know him any better, let alone have a second date. His “no pressure” approach certainly felt like a lot of pressure.

I initially replied to his text messages in a timely manner to be polite, but I eventually let this last text message go unreplied. My work bestie told me that replying quickly only shows that I’m also interested, so if I take a long time to respond (or don’t respond at all), then he would get the hint. Of course, she was right; he got the hint. I haven’t heard from him since that message. I felt bad at first for ignoring him like that, but I didn’t feel as bad as I should have had I really cared that much (that sounds like a confusing sentence, but it makes sense in my head).

Anyway, as the previous post indicated, the date with the second online guy went well. I deliberately refrained from any communication with him since our date. My plan was to wait a week and then invite him to see a movie or something, continuing to keep the date/friend situation vague. I was pleasantly surprised today (less than a week) when he text messaged me and asked how my weekend went. I’m glad he waited until after the weekend to contact me; it tells me that he’s not overly eager but he’d still like to hang out.

After a few text messages back and forth, I asked him if he wanted to see a movie later in the week. He said yes! We’re set to see Julie & Julia on Thursday night!

It’s funny. Last week, whenever my phone alerted me of a text message, I feared that it was another message from the first online guy. Today, I anxiously awaited replies from the second online guy (it didn’t help that I was getting messages from other friends interspersed throughout our texting conversation). I think it’s pretty clear which guy I like better.

Second Online Guy

My date with the second online guy was good! We met up at the cafe inside a local bookstore around 8:15pm (this was two evenings ago). Since my date had come straight from work, I figured he hadn’t eaten dinner yet, so we went to California Pizza Kitchen instead of having coffee. Both of my dates this week were supposed to be coffee dates but turned into dinner dates!

While we were waiting to be seated for dinner, there was a woman with a stroller trying to leave the restaurant and was struggling to open the door. My date jumped up in the middle of our conversation and held the door open for her. After she left, he sat back down and continued talking as if nothing had happened. What a nice guy!

We had a nice dinner with good conversation, but it felt more like dinner with a friend than a romantic date. It’s possible that our meeting wasn’t meant to be romantic at all; the wording in our emails is vague. We shook hands at the end of the night (no hug). This situation is completely fine with me, though. He seems like a really nice person, so I can definitely see being friends with him.

There’s actually a new/recent movie that we both want to see. I’m considering inviting him to see it with me sometime next week. Turning my date into a friend would be a great outcome of this online dating thing!

One last thing: he paid for dinner! I didn’t pay on either date this week!

First Online Guy

I was barely at work for an hour yesterday and my boss had managed to stress me out. It’s gotten to the point where she only has to instant message me with a simple sentence and I will feel terrible for the whole day. That coupled with freaking out about my date made for a very painful day. I almost thought of cancelling my date for fear that I wouldn’t be in the mood to meet someone for the first time. Luckily, I didn’t feel nearly as stressed after I got off work.

I met my date (the first online guy in the previous post) at Third Street Promenade in Santa Monica. I initially asked him to coffee/tea (easier to escape if the date went badly), but it was only about 6:45pm when we met, so we ended up eating dinner together. We had Fatburger. I had never been to Fatburger before; it was really good, even though it’s clearly not a date place. We ate outside and watched the passersby (Have you ever noticed how strange the pluralization of passerby is? Weird!). Oh, and if you’re wondering, he paid for dinner!

After walking along Third Street for a while (stopping to check out the various street performers), we headed down to Santa Monica Pier. It was around sunset, so the view of the ocean was just beautiful. We ended up sitting on a bench at the end of the pier overlooking both the ocean and the city. At the end of the night (around 10pm), he walked me to my car (all the parking lots down there look the same, so I easily could have gotten lost if I was by myself) and gave me a hug before we parted ways.

The date went very well. Santa Monica is a great place for a first date (or any date for that matter). Even still, I don’t know if I like the guy in the dating sense. I think we could be friends, but I don’t currently feel like we could be more.

He, however, seems to like me a lot. As I was driving home last night, he texted me asking for me to text him when I got home safely (I live farther from Santa Monica than he does). Then today, around lunchtime, he texted me asking how my day was going and what I had eaten for lunch (creepy). After a few replies back and forth, he asked me if I was doing something on Saturday. I told him I was busy (I really might be!), and he sent this: “I had a good time yesterday and would like to see you again. When is a good day/time?”

If I felt the same way he does, then maybe I wouldn’t mind setting up a second date so soon after the first date, but this was a little (way way way) too fast for me. I was freaking out. I didn’t want to set up definite plans so quickly, but I didn’t want to be mean and shoot him down either. I don’t want to be a heartbreaker!

I’m not sure which is worse: being heartbroken or being the heartbreaker. I’ve felt sort of like a heartbreaker before (a totally different story for perhaps another time), and I possibly felt worse than being rejected by someone I liked. I don’t know if I can handle this whole dating thing.

I called both my sister (I love that I can call her about this!) and my work bestie and asked them what to do. They both agreed that I was probably reading too much into it. A second date isn’t a commitment, only another chance to get to know someone better.

The guy sensed my hesitation from the fact that I didn’t text back right away, so he texted me again with: “If you don’t want to it’s cool. Just tell me.” I felt bad, and I didn’t necessarily want to burn the bridge right away. I told him it would be nice to hang out again but that next week is better and I would let him know then. He replied: “Sure. No worries. I am a very no pressure sort of guy. Just want to make sure you are comfortable. That is all.”

Obviously, he’s a really nice guy. Who knows, maybe I’m only hesitating because I’ve never been on a second date before. Everything seems to be moving very quickly, but I really don’t want to rush into anything (I fear change). I still have a date with the second online guy tomorrow night!

Online Dating

A few days before her last day at work (this was about a week and a half ago), my work bestie created a profile for me on a free online dating website. I had tried online dating before with not much luck, but I decided not to delete the profile since my work bestie really wanted me to use it. Before I knew it, I was emailing back and forth with two guys. By the end of the week, one of them asked for my number and the other gave me his!

The first online guy text messaged me on Friday afternoon (while I was still at work) asking if I had time to talk. I called him back as I left work, and we were on the phone for over an hour. We talked about a whole range of topics, including ex-boyfriends (his, since I don’t have any), driving (he, like me, was also scared of driving for a long time), marriage (he doesn’t want to get married, I haven’t decided), children (he wants a child in the very near future, I’m undecided on when), and our life goals (he has very defined goals, whereas I don’t). It was a very loaded first phone call.

Honestly, I’m not a big phone person; I’d rather just meet and talk in person. He’s out of town this weekend, so we made tentative plans to meet early next week. But he called me up again last night, as he was on his way to hang out with some friends. I was on the phone with him for another forty minutes while he was driving. Did I mention I’m not a big phone person? Anyway, after the two phone calls, I already have my hesitations about this guy (but his profile picture is pretty cute, and talking to him via email was very easy and natural), so we’ll see what happens when we actually meet.

The second online guy text messaged me yesterday (Saturday) afternoon. I asked him to a coffee date sometime this week; we’ll probably meet Wednesday night (I’m actually texting with him as I’m writing this). We haven’t talked on the phone yet (might be a good thing), but from what I can tell, he seems like a really nice guy. Also, my work bestie thinks he’s cuter than the first guy (at this point I’m undecided).

As I had mentioned a long time ago, I honestly gave up on finding love. I don’t know if online dating will give me hope or reinforce my bachelorhood, but I’m really nervous!