I Need A Hobby

I’m definitely a workaholic. Because I love my job so much, most of my fun and excitement these days comes from work. I’m losing the balance between work and life outside work. Even on my days off, the only thing I can think of doing (unless my college friends are free to hang out, which is rare) is to go shopping at Target, which is a lot like working. Basically, I need a hobby.

Throughout high school, college, and graduate school, I sang in a choir. With my erratic work schedule, it’s hard to schedule a fixed time every week to sing in a choir. Not only that, but I don’t really know of any decent choirs in my neighborhood (albeit I haven’t looked that hard).

Video games are a good distraction, but I haven’t been into playing them lately. I currently don’t own any games for my Playstation 3, and buying games is really expensive. My brother has our Wii right now (we share everything), but I didn’t play it very often when I did have it. Also, getting lost in a game for hours at a time can get tedious and boring, but playing for only an hour doesn’t seem worth it either.

I wouldn’t consider exercise as a hobby (it’s more of a necessary part of staying healthy), but I used to go to the gym a lot. Now that I run around all day for work, I don’t feel like exercising on my day off. It’s not like I need to lose more weight anyway; I weigh 40 pounds less now than when I was at my heaviest.

The one hobby I can think of (besides shopping) is to make my digital pictures into prints and make photo albums. But every time I vaguely choose which pictures to print, I second guess myself and end up not printing any of them. My indecisiveness strikes again.

Anyway. I have the next two days off. I haven’t had an entire weekend off since I started working at Target. I’m hanging out with my sister on Sunday (because her birthday is coming up), but that still leaves all of tomorrow with no agenda.

Interview Anxiety

My store team leader (STL) called me into his office today. He said he would send my resume over to a STL from a different Target in our district, and that STL will call me to set up a pre-screen interview, probably near the end of next week. If I make it through that interview, then I get to go through three more interviews before becoming an ETL.

I’m already starting to freak out, even though my first interview hasn’t even been set yet. So much weight is placed on the interviews, and I haven’t had much experience with interviews. My only real interviews were for my current job at Target, and those were very informal. I was applying on a lark anyway, so I didn’t think too much about the outcome. This time, I really want the job. The stakes are much higher.

One of my worst fears is being interviewed. I don’t think I make a very strong first impression, and I don’t see why anyone would hire me over other people. Luckily, one of the ETLs is going to coach me in interviewing. She really wants to help me become an ETL. I just hope we can turn me into an employable person by the end of next week.

I Didn’t Rinse Long Enough

My bathroom has two sinks (I share my room with my brother, when he’s home). Since my parents’ sink in their bathroom isn’t working properly, they brush their teeth in my bathroom. We usually brush our teeth at different times, but tonight my mom and I were brushing our teeth around the same time.

After I used my mouthwash, my mom commented that I didn’t rinse for the full 60 seconds that the bottle of mouthwash recommends. I was pretty surprised that she would make a comment like that. First of all, I’m 25. I know how to take care of my own teeth. I don’t need my mom to time me when I brush my teeth or rinse my mouth with mouthwash.

Second, there’s no clock in my bathroom. How does she know exactly how long a minute is? I estimate the time myself, and my teeth are in really good shape. I don’t see how I’m going to ruin my teeth because I rinsed my mouth for 45 seconds instead of a full minute.

This isn’t a big deal at all, but I thought the comment was absurd. It’s instances like this that make me feel like a kid, stunted from growing up (and not in the good way, like Peter Pan). I really shouldn’t be living at home anymore.

A Paycheck Is Still A Paycheck

I had lunch with a friend (the girlfriend of my college friend) today. She was all dressed up in professional attire; she had been going around different retail stores giving out her resume and asking about management positions.

As I mentioned before, my friend is currently unemployed. With the US economy sucking right now (and only getting worse), it’s really hard to find any sort of job these days. I feel very lucky to have a job, even if it pays well below my qualifications.

That makes me think about a hypothetical (hopefully it stays hypothetical) situation. If the ETL opportunity at Target never becomes a reality, then should I continue working at Target in my current capacity? On one hand, if I have no future with the company, then why should I stay? On the other hand, there’s no telling how long I could be unemployed if I left. A paycheck is still a paycheck, even as meager as mine is.

I’ve been holding back on applying for other jobs and looking at other options while I wait for the ETL position. I’m going to give the store team leader another week or two to get back to me. If he makes me wait too long (or, God forbid, I don’t get the ETL job), I have to reevaluate my situation and my employment with Target.

Ever Ever After

I tried resisting liking Carrie Underwood, since Kelly Clarkson will always be my American Idol, but I just can’t help liking her. The fact that she sings country music is definitely a plus in my book.

Her song “Ever Ever After” from the movie Enchanted is really good. It’s more pop than country, but the line between the two genres is blurring lately. I love almost anything from Disney, so this song is just combining a lot of my favorite things into one.

This is the music video for “Ever Ever After.” Enjoy!

Opening And Closing

It’s been a long day. I got up at 5:30am (15 minutes before my alarm) to go with my friend to buy a Wii. My friend’s original Wii was stolen when little thieves broke into his apartment about a month ago. I got a tip from the inside that my Target was going to have Wiis today, so we made a plan to go before the store opened to guarantee that we would get one.

Waiting for a Wii is painless and more fun when you go with a friend. The time flew by. When the Wii first came out, I tried finding one by myself. It was pouring rain, and I walked to five different stores (I didn’t have a car in graduate school). I ended up soaked and empty handed.

I was really tired by the early afternoon (I’m really not used to waking up at 5:30am). Today was my day off, so I figured I could just relax all day. That is, it was my day off until Target called me to work the closing shift tonight. It was funny to see the store at opening and closing on the same day, though it felt like two separate days.

At first I thought I was going to fall asleep while working, or at least be inefficient. But when I actually started working, I didn’t feel tired at all. I didn’t even yawn until after I got off work and came home. I certainly don’t remember studying math to have that effect on me!

Upgraded Team Member

The ETLs all know that I want to be an ETL. They’ve started giving me tips and extra things to do so that I stand out above the other team members. I already do good work and am consistently reliable, but they’re helping me stand out just that much more.

I’m very comfortable talking to the ETLs like peers or friends. I took my lunch break today around the same time as the ETLs, so I got to sit with them while we ate. I felt special; ordinary team members don’t usually sit with the ETLs.

I like to listen to what the ETLs say to each other. I find out a little bit about them personally, and I learn more about the ETL position and the details of how the store runs. Learning as much as I can now will only help me later, if and when I train to become an ETL.

Having added responsibilities and knowing more than the ordinary team member makes me feel special and important. I feel like I’ve been upgraded beyond my position. I’m not quite a team leader, but I’m not just a regular team member either (although my paycheck begs to differ). Hopefully I get upgraded all the way to ETL!

Private Tutoring

One of my team leaders at Target is taking a math course at a nearby community college. He knows I have a master’s degree in math, so he asked me to tutor him tonight.

We met up at a Barnes and Noble, and we stayed there for three and a half hours. That’s a long time for a tutoring session, but he needed the help. The math he’s learning is not very advanced (I think I learned it in junior high), but it still takes practice and concentration to learn.

Tutoring my team leader got me thinking about tutoring as a career. Not to brag, but I surprised myself with how patient I was with him. I really enjoy tutoring, and I’m far more patient with my students than many other tutors.

Private tutoring can easily add up to a lot of money as well. For the record, though, I didn’t tutor my team leader for the money. I actually undercharged him quite a bit. I usually give a discount to friends.

The problem with tutoring is that the number of hours I work would be uncertain. Since I’m not affiliated with any school, no one would know me at first. It would be hard to build a reputation and bring in tutees. After a while, I guess, I would get referrals and build a little business out of it.

In the end, tutoring seems more like a second job than a primary one. But since my schedule at Target changes every week, it would be hard to tutor regularly while still keeping my current job. I think I’m going to wait for the store team leader to get back to me about the ETL position and go from there.

Two Steps Backward

I’m thinking about hanging out with the girlfriend of one of my college friends tomorrow, like I did last week. I passively mentioned this to my parents, and they seemed weirded out. They’re afraid that my friend is going to get jealous or think that something is going on between his girlfriend and me.

My friend knows I’m gay. I would never try to steal his girlfriend away. That thought makes me laugh, except that my parents weren’t joking. They suggested that I instead hang out wtih my female friend from college who they like and is currently single. Their suggestion makes me laugh too. I’m going to suddenly start dating my friend just because she’s female and single? Is that really how straight people get together?

I haven’t mentioned being gay to my parents since March 6, 2002, and that time didn’t take (I’ve talked about this before). I thought that since they stopped badgering me about getting married and finding a girl to cook for me, then they must have realized on some level that I’m gay and backed off the subject. Apparently, I was wrong. They really didn’t believe me, and I will inevitably have to explain it to them again.

Back Pain

My back has been hurting lately. Every morning when I wake up, my middle/lower back hurts. The pain usually goes away after about an hour of being awake (faster if I take a shower), but I’ve been feeling it recently while I work too. It’s not a sharp pain, but there’s definitely something wrong.

I had some neck pain about a month ago, so I bought a Tempur-Pedic pillow to see if it would make a difference. My neck stopped hurting, but the back pain started soon afterward. At first I thought it was because I wasn’t used to the pillow (I heard it takes a couple weeks to become adjusted to it). I switched back to my regular pillow, but the pain persisted.

I think that the pain is actually just from working too hard at Target. I’m walking and standing the entire time I’m working, sometimes even running to help a guest or quickly put go-backs away. I’m trying to not make a big scene with my parents about it, because they would probably just tell me to quit my job for my health.

I just started wearing orthopedic insoles in my shoes, but they’re not specifically for back pain. Maybe I should get some Dr. Scholl’s insoles that are designed for relieving back pain associated with walking all day long. Sadly, those insoles aren’t gel. I wanted to be gellin’. Like Magellan.

Hopefully the insoles help. I really want to try a memory foam mattress topper, but my parents won’t settle for anything less than Tempur-Pedic brand, and there’s no way they’re buying me a mattress topper that expensive (and I can’t buy it with the money I make right now).